Soul Matters... April 2007

The Pastoral Conversation

Spiritual Struggles Have Emotional Impact

Is "pastoral" counseling necessary?

New research from PC&CC counselor Gabriel Dy-Liacco’s offers some insight into this question, investigating the connections between spiritual struggles and psychological flourishing. Beginning with the idea that when God seems present, we often feel there are endless possibilities in life and love, Dy-Liacco and his colleagues have examined what happens in a person’s life when God seems absent. Such separation can create feelings of abandonment and punishment that are undeniably psychological. In fact, a perceived disruption in God’s presence may carry even more weight than that of the comfort found in one’s original, connected relationship with the divine. Exploring the ways that spiritual struggles impact such things as positivity and general satisfaction with life, Dy-Liacco’s research team asked the question, what happens when “bad” life events are seen as spiritual in nature?

Dy-Liacco’s research revealed that one’s sense of abandonment by God has unique connections to a sense of altruism, purpose, and positivity – topics often addressed in therapy. Specifically, those experiencing stronger struggles with their spirituality may demonstrate less altruistic behavior and have less of a sense of purpose in life. The implications for counseling work are clear, as therapists unwilling or unable to address spiritual struggles may miss a valuable opportunity to help their clients achieve a balanced sense of well-being. Counselors open to integrating such spiritual discussion may be able to introduce a deeper level of reflection for their clients that is more lasting and significant in the long term.

This is the first in a series that will continue "The Pastoral Conversation." For more about this study and its implications for counselors, feel free to contact Dy-Liacco at 202-449-3789 x705.

Relationship Tip of the Month

Reconnecting at the end of the day: How do you greet your partner when you first see him at the end of your day? The way you reconnect sets the tone for the evening ahead. A hug and a kiss are a wonderful reentry ritual. Even if you’re preoccupied or frustrated, make the effort to give your mate a hug anyway. Then tell him you’ve had a hard day. By letting him in on your reality you give him valuable information he needs in order to relate well with you. Giving each other an emotional update coupled with a warm embrace will bring big dividends of mutual understanding, support, and shared peace.

-From The Little Book of Love Tips by Martha Beveridge

THERAPIST SPOTLIGHT: Joanne Comstock, LCPC, NCC

For years, PC&CC therapist Joanne Comstock found herself sitting with people who just needed to talk. “I seemed to be the kind of person who would just be at the airport, and someone would pick me out to talk to,” she recalls. “It just kept happening, over and over, people opening up to me and I felt called to figure out how to really help them.” After a discernment process that led her to seminary and then to Loyola College’s pastoral counseling department, Comstock now sees her counseling work as her way of living out God’s call. Amid her work with individual clients at PC&CC, she also is completing her Ph.D. examining the spiritual and religious connections between self control and negative affect (learn more about her work here).

Comstock enjoys an eclectic client base, helping people with depression and anxiety, eating disorders, addictions, and other challenges. She also uses Imago Relationship Therapy with couples and has considerable experience working with children and families. She finds particular satisfaction working with clergy, who comprise nearly a third of her caseload.

“There’s a wonderful realization that counseling work doesn’t just need to be about being ‘in trouble.’ It’s also about growing, self-awareness, and self-care,” she says. “A lot of the clergy I see need a safe place to take care of themselves and to talk confidentially about the things that other people bring to them. It’s really an honor to do that work.”

Comstock works in PC&CC’s Bethesda office and may be reached at 202-449-3789 x703

Referral Corner

Most of us in the caregiving field have had the experience of working with a particularly challenging client and wondering if he or she would be better served by someone with a different sort of training. Wicks & Rodgerson (1998) write that “a vital part of being a caregiver is to know when we are not the right person to care for this individual and to know when we have reached our limitations in helping the person.” Here are a few questions to ask if you are considering making a referral to a professional counseling agency:

-Is this client facing a challenge that I haven’t seen before?

-Is this client requiring more attention than I am used to providing?

-Do I feel unusually exhausted after a session with this client?

-Am I worried about this client’s welfare between meetings?

PC&CC counselors are available to help you find additional resources for your clients. Feel free to contact us anytime for consultation.

PC&CC EVENT CALENDAR:

Our “Getting the Love You Want” workshops for couples can serve as excellent premarital preparation or as a way to supercharge a couple’s ongoing marriage counseling. The two-day course offers the equivalent of 6 months in couples counseling work. The next Washington, DC workshops will be on May 5-6 and July 14-15. Click here for more information.